Vexatious and poisoned environment – Kingston Pride Inc.

Aphrodisiac, Mimi, and Tyffanie closing out a drag routine.
Update to article on February 19, 2016 at 22:00 at the bottom of this post

The recent harassment experienced by one specific board member by other board members is appalling and deplorable. On Friday, February 12, 2016 board members knowingly and viciously singled out, harassed, and shamed Andres Caravantes for being a sex positive and proud drag queen as portrayed in the Queens Journal article “For the love of drag” published on February 11, 2016. Andres was made to feel he was singled out by Daryl Fraser, Chair of Kingston Pride Inc., from all other board members in Facebook messages (below) in an attempt to portray some moral story of what not to do as a drag queen and what not to do as a board member of Kingston Pride Inc. The harassment, ridicule, and shaming continued against Andres by John Bryant – Director of Communications (elected board member), and Stacey Rosbury – Coordinator for Andres’ portrayal of a sex positive, out and proud drag queen at Queens University.

It is clear the Queens Journal article made no reference to Kingston Pride Inc. and the article’s intent was not to discredit or portray Kingston Pride Inc. negatively in the public forum. Yet board members of Kingston Pride Inc. felt they had a right to single out, harass, and shame Andres. There were accusations of being a bad drag queen, being a negative portrayal of drag and as a Kingston Pride Inc. Board member, and for being too young.

On the following scheduled Kingston Pride Inc. meeting on February 18, 2016, I attended in my capacity as Parade Coordinator, a volunteer position. Andres expressed his displeasure for the mistreatment. I also expressed my distaste for the mistreatment. Instead of apologies or empathy for Andres, he was further ridiculed by existing board members Bill Boileau, Director of Fund Development (elected board member).

I was asked to help advocate for Andres’ case to the board. It was my intention to ask the board for a formal apology. Due to unforeseen circumstances, not all officers could attend and quorum was not met. Therefore, I did not get an opportunity to formally ask the board for an apology since this was not a formal meeting.

In my attempt to relay the concerns Andres and I had regarding the harassment, I was ridiculed and harassed myself by Bill Boileau, Director of Fund Development. I was advised by him forcibly that I could not act as an advocate of Andres and the matter did not concern me. Bill later accused me of being a pervert and pedophile for performing my duties as Parade Coordinator (I messaged the volunteer Fair Coordinator to speak about coordinating efforts for city permit applications etc as seen below). I felt hurt and very upset by these untrue accusations of my own character. I asked him to apologize immediately and he did not.

No formal apologies to Andres Caravantes has taken place and in the act of righting a wrong for a board member I was singled out and harassed by a vexatious board of directors. It is clear a formal apology for Andres and myself will never occur by the current sitting board. This Kingston Pride Inc. Board, I believe, is a vexatious and poisoned environment for all volunteers.

I formally resign as Parade Coordinator volunteer effective immediately. I cannot condone these actions by the board against Andres or myself. I will not sit on this board which openly sullies my good name and those of other members.


Messages in Kingston Pride Inc.’s secret Facebook group

Feb 18 - 1

Feb 18 - 2

Feb 18 - 3

Feb 18 - 4

Feb 18 - 5


Messages to Fair Coordinator

To the best of my knowledge, the Fair Coordinator is over the age of 18 and I clearly have not and did not make any inappropriate advances to the volunteer.

Feb18-FairCoordinator


 

Further to – Update on February 19, 2016 at 22:00

Accusations of my need for fame and my petty nature are the official response from Kingston Pride Inc.  In comments to this blog, Stacey Rosbury – Coordinator spoke with some authority for Kingston Pride Inc. but it was hard to believe it was an official response per se.  However, a similar comment from Stacey was posted to the Queen’s Journal with a forward/beginning paragraph clearly indicating she was speaking on behalf of Kingston Pride Inc.  Here is a screen capture of the response as captured on the Queen’s Journal website.

Further to

11 comments

  • Barb Tilander-Mack Treasurer

    It is with great sadness that I read all that transpired, however, I feel it unfair that all board members are being painted with the same brush.

    I, for one, was unaware of all that had happened. I volunteered to be a part of Kingston Pride in order to unite the community and create a positive image in the community. We all have different backgrounds, views, and personalities, however, if we can not put these aside and work as a team, I’m afraid we are fighting an uphill battle.

  • No one said pedophile..the comment was pervert. You or Keith do not need to meet with any member of Kingston pride, as you, he (and I) are not official members. Any meetings for pride can and will be done in an official manner, not over wine.

    Everyone knows you are trying to start some sort of a hoopla..comments were made about that article because of what was portrayed by either the writer or by comments either in fun or serious by Andres. If the comments were meant as a joke it was NOT taken that way in the end. If you were a serious person in being a Drag person, you would know the effort and commitment that goes into performing! What has happened these last few days or so has NOTHING to do with you! You dont need to be someones “advocate”, Andres can speak for himself. When something gets posted in a paper, we as Canadians have the right to retort. Freedom of speach! Nothing negative was said. It was a retort to how the drag community was being portrayed in general.

    Andres (was) being a member of Kingston Pride Inc, makes him (or any of us) susceptible to examination as we have positivity of pride and a certain look to uphold. Him saying that negativity can look bad upon what we are trying to portray. The members of the LGBTTIQQ2SA community go through enough in society and their life, let along being portrayed like this by one of their own. So excuse some of us for speaking our minds and defending ourselves.

    No appology is needed, we said no wrong. The meeting was recorded for all to hear.

    PS>You copy and pasting the messages withing the Pride group site was just petty. Its only a private group so that we can chat and plan. Nothing is malicious as you would have everyone think. Grow up

    • Thank you, Stacey, for providing Kingston Pride Inc.’s official stance on this (since you are using your Kingston Pride email address and your comments clearly show you are speaking on behalf of the board… almost advocating for the board, one might say). And thank you for affirming the slanderous comments made against me did take place last night.
      I may point out that you may not be aware but I have submitted a letter to Kingston Pride Inc. to the Chair and Secretary. In this letter, I advised the corporation to cease from making slanderous comments about me and any further comments may result in my seeking of legal opinion.

  • This is a joke.

  • Andres Caravantes

    Stacey, if you didn’t take my comment as a joke that is due to your own illiteracy. The comment is clearly followed with the phrase “Caravantes joked.” You took it the way you wanted to, not the way it was intended and clearly presented. Whether or not you think it was a personal attack on me, it sure felt like it and that is all that matters in the end. And I don’t know why you all keep bringing up that the meetings are recorded…anyone who listens to them will clearly see that there were slanderous comments made and that the attitudes of several board members were not appropriate and continued to fuel the fire.

  • Stacey,

    First let me say thank you for clearing up that Pedophile was not used and that Pervert was. Let me point out the use of this term being put forth is indeed slander and I would hope that the person receiving this label will look into legal action against Kingston Pride Inc.

    Furthermore I find it hard to believe that Kingston Pride Inc. would respond to any media that clearly does not represent you. A Queen has every right to express herself in a public forum as she feels fit. This Queen was not acting as a rep for Pride so it really is non of Kingston Pride Inc. business what was or not said in the article.

    You seem to feel like you know what is expected from a Queen, I ask that you share this knowledge with the rest of us. Having been a Queen for years in the Kingston Community I have never heard of such Guidelines or Rules we must follow. Are these rules ones you have made? As I have said NO Queen is responsible to you unless you have PAID them for their work, I believe this article was done on his time and not as a member of a committee.

    How has this article made the Kingston Pride look bad? What image are you trying to Portray? I can say from the outside it looks like you are trying to control performers and have everyone express your views only.

    Also let me point out that the Queen in question has every right to ask for someone to support them and advocate on their behalf, that choice is not yours or Kingston Pride Inc. Perhaps Kingston Pride Inc, should look to the community for support on what your jobs and roles are. There are a vast number of people who have experience and Im sure would assist you in figuring it out.

    In the mean time I suggest that Kingston Pride Inc keep their noses out of the bedroom of its members and focus on being inclusive rather then time spent trying to control what they clearly don’t understand. Queens work for themselves and that must be remembered, you or no one else can place limits unless you are paying their bills.

  • I am a member of the community who had high hopes for the new Kingston Pride committee. After seeing this exchange, I’m of the thinking “the more things change, the more they stay the same”.

    I only know Ms Tiffanie through other friends and do not know the other parties involved. Being a relatively neutral third-party, I offer my thoughts:

    The tone of John Bryant comes across as threatening. The face-to-face comments leads me to think that their could be a physical threat and/or this type of meeting comes down to He Said/She Said with no written record;
    2) The irony that the one individual is being called out a supposed joke comment (no clue if it was said in jest or in seriousness) because it may reflect poorly on Kingston Pride while making comments perceived as threatening by the individual it was directed as as being a joke;
    3) The personal attacks are one of the reasons why the last board was forced to resign. It seems no lessons were learned by the new members
    4) The comments regarding bullying. In my mind, if a person is feeling bullied, then perhaps attitudes and behaviours should be reviewed.
    5). The entire thread turned into mob-mentality. The belittling responses to the bullying comments only show that either you agree with those in power, or you are left behind

    6). To an independent observer, the thread is very much bullying.

    I have more thoughts but honestly the entire thing simply depresses me too much to put any further effort into it.

    It is clear that the new board, or at least a good portion of them, are no different from the previous one and nothing will change.

    Thank you to any and all volunteers to helped organize events over the years. I’m finished with anything Kingston Pride is associated with and will put my energies elsewhere. I wish everyone involved good luck.

    As a parting thought, members of the KPI team should be aware of what it means to be on a board and incorporated. This can end badly for even the ones trying to do good

  • You people really have to think for yourselves instead of following in her footsteps lol..I personally never said anything bad. I am trying to defend kingston pride inc. the company that tyffanie wants to break down cause she cant control…

    Meetings could not be held in peace because things were started pettily by her..hopefully now Kingston Pride Inc can get on with things and do its job.

    🙂

  • blah blah…

    You people are funny…that this is all you have to do.

  • I know many of the people being discussed in the dialogue above.

    I have known Jim, since before Tyfannie’s inception. Hehad a wonderful soul (Jas Morgan) to guide him to becoming the positive outgoing gracious queen she has become. I have through the years see her pass on her guidance to new queens in training. It is wonderful to see the leadership pass on.

    I can 100% tell you Jim (Tyfannie) is not a pedophile or pervert, and the sheer mention of this is slanderous.

    I am very saddened to see the bullying that has been carried out over the past week in such a public arena.
    We are all trying to unite the LGTB community, not belittle people, and make them feel unworthy.

    Kingston Pride Inc you should be ashamed of yourself. If you are trying to portray as a professional organization, you are a complete joke. No one is going to affiliate themselves or their businesses with your poorly run organization.

    Several things to think about:
    ***** Silence is Golden *****

    ***** If you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all *****

    In closing, I would expect nothing less then a full PUBLIC apology to both Jim, Tyffanie and Andres.

    Mark

  • Pingback: The poison continues via proxy bullying | Tyffanie.com

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